This is what I look like

Syd picked up the camera a few days ago and was taking pictures. I said cheese for a few and then went back to my endless studying. Well tonight when I downloaded the pictures to my computer I found that she took this one. Pretty good composition if you ask me! Well I guess to the eyes of the world and sometimes to my children this is what I look like.

Reading glasses on, pulling out my hair, nose in a book. I guess for the next 3 months, this is me!

Something good.... There are times when I am buried in a book. But, I can also proudly say that this week I have played in the dirt with Becks and watched an entire Barbie movie with Syd. I'm still a Mommy too!
K

Watch me!

Stress, evil people who think their words hurt me, school, no sleep, no money, no job prospects, tests, clinicals, single parenting..... it's hard. Of course it's hard. But I'm not that girl anymore. I'm not going to cry in the corner and beg for help.

I am doing this, you are not here. I am happy that you are not here. I am better with you gone. Peace and determination has finally filled my life.

While you sit, gaining spiderwebs and calories, losing your children and your hair, I am kicking life's ass....WATCH ME!!

Something good....freedom from oppression and lawyers who know what they're doing!

K

Hau'oli la Hanau

This little baby is 26 today....

Something good....the new Third Eye Blind cd!
K

And it starts....

Last semester! At least of nursing school. I am already planning what my next school goals are going to be. But I have been working on becoming a nurse for 5 years! That's right I took my first pre-req 5 years ago! It all starts tomorrow. 3 1/2 months and then I'm finished.

How am I feeling right now? Terrified, excited, nervous, sad, nauseous, happy, relieved....pick an emotion and I'm probably cycling through it. I can do this! It's hard, really hard! But I have some amazing help and support. So here we go.....

Something good...I won't have to wear these peacock (turquoise) scrubs anymore!

K

Sydnee's First Day of Kindergarten

There should be a mandatory get together lunch for all the Mommy's who have to leave their babies at school for the very first time. Why don't enrichment committees ever think of that? The veteran Moms can celebrate, and the rookie Moms can cry!


I am excited! I know that she needs to be in school, it just stings a little because there should be another parent next to me. You know the one who is also a little emotional but then teases me and tells me not to be such a big baby about it!


I kept telling Syd that I wasn't going to let her go to school. She is too little and she needs to stay home with me forever. Sydnee's response was "I have to go to school. I need to learn to do hair and talk on a phone!" Wait aren't you going to kindergarten or are you skipping that and moving
straight into junior high?


We had a family dinner last night and Sydnee got to pick what we were eating. She picked nachos (steak fajitas) and cupcakes.


Master griller that I am!


Syd showing off the cupcakes that she made!


Becks watching Thomas the train, while holding Thomas the train and probably thinking "Mom, you're distracting me from Thomas the train!"

Bella, that little puppy who I think looks like a teenager dog.

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!!!

Sydnee picked to wear an outfit that Grandma McBride sent her. Thank you it is so adorable!

She's too big, make her stop!

I asked her why her eyes were so squinty. She told me that's just how she smiles.

Waiting outside the classroom

And now I get to spend all day with this spunky monkey!

Good luck Sassy! Don't worry about being shy, you'll get over that. I know you're excited to make friends, it will happen. I love you! I am so proud of you! You are the best helper and I'm really going to miss you. I can't believe how big you are getting. You've already had more heartache and trials in your little life than you should, and you're going to have more. But I love you baby. You are such a stubborn independent girl, who makes sure she always gets what she wants. You keep that, don't give up who you are and what you want.

Something good....pretty pink flowers

K

EXTRA EXTRA Read all about it!!!

Do I have your attention? Good! Cause I got some BIG news! Best new that I have ever had the privilege to write and share. Plus I've been keeping this a secret for almost 3 WEEKS! I am so ready because I'm pretty sure that those of you who know the people I'm talking about will be just as excited as I am.

Sorry for that teaser, but I have to tell this story chronologically....

Flight for AZ, I had written down as leaving on Thursday at noon. Babysitter comes, I tell multiple people I leave at noon get in to AZ around 1:40ish. So I'm driving along I have my itinerary in my purse and about the time that I'm 40 minutes from the airport I pick up my ticket and glance down to notice that; NO actually my flight boards in 10 minutes!
#$$%*^%$^@#
Call my Mom, text some people, cry for about a minute then my Mom calls back says that the next flight leaves in an hour and it's pretty open so I can fly stand-by. Whew!
(Obviously this pic is before I realized that I had been looking at the wrong time for 3 weeks)

Get on the plane and happen to end up sitting there for 1 1/2hours because they were missing a navigational part and it will only take 20 minutes to fix (the captain announced at least 4 times that it would be 20 more minutes) By this time, I am actually laughing!!! Thinking, at least I'm alone and I'm not having to entertain a child for 5 hours!

Finally get there and finally get to have 100% proof that the news I'm going to share is really happening! Are you ready? Sitting on the edge of your desk chair????

Emily is PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!

Scott and Emme have been trying for YEARS! She's had some difficulties, and honestly I have always thought that they would be the BEST parents! I would give them my children if I wasn't so darn attached to them myself. She called me 3 weeks ago while I was at work to tell me. I had to run into the medicine room because I was screaming and crying! I am so HAPPY for them. So happy that I had to fly all the way to AZ just to hug her!!

Isn't that baby going to be soooo adorable? Emme and I have already picked out names (sorry Scott, we'll let you be in the delivery room!)

She's 12 weeks and is due Feb. 22nd. So already I'm having to see what my schedule is going to be in February because I don't plan on missing this baby's arrival!

Seriously? How lucky is this kid to have such COOL parents?

It was really nice having a weekend off. Totally whirlwind (I saw 3 movies went out to a million meals) but so much fun!

Of course Dakota and I had a bunch of FUN! Thanks for being my chauffeur, luggage carrier, movie date, sushi orderer, and just making me smile!

Something good....my Mom! Thank you for calming me down when I missed my flight. For taking care of my crazy kids, and my hyper dog. For cleaning my house when I was gone, and all the other little things that I don't thank you enough for. I love you Mom! I couldn't do any of this without your love and endless support!

K

AZ or bust!

Don't ask why, cause I probably won't tell you. But I'm going to AZ tomorrow for 3 days. Lots of reasons, most of them are hush hush right now. So, maybe when I get back I can spread some good news!

Something good.....HEAT!!!!
K

Happy Birthday Gavin!!

Ahh the Lewis Family! What can I say, Lisa and I always joke that every birthday involves our family, parents and each other! It was Gavin's 3rd birthday yesterday so we all went to the Denver Zoo then had a party!

I met Lisa when I first moved to Colorado. She was 5 months pregnant with Gavin and I had just found out I was pregnant with Beckham!

The Lewis'
Chad, Gavin, Ryan and Lisa

Sydnee and Ryan

These two are inseparable!

Mommy and the BIRTHDAY BOY!!!

The only place you can ever find Dip n Dots is at amusement parks!

I love Rainbow Ice, I always have to get some!

I was a warm day and we had to take a break to feed our wild animals!

Becks and Gavin. Buddies from the womb!

Syd and Mommy. The Denver Zoo is so pretty

Party time!

I was so exhausted that I didn't take as many pictures as I usually do. But there was a pinata and my children attempted to destroy it!

Beckham thought it was so fun

Syd was out to destroy! She knocked it down!

Random picture of Sydnee and Ryan a few days earlier when Lisa invited us over for a pancake breakfast

SILLY STRING FIGHT!!!

Okay, I love silly string! LOVE IT! I makes me giddy! So Lisa bought some for the kids but there was no way I wasn't going to attack some people!

Chad totally got snipered! Yeah, I'm the greatest!!

Everyone got hit by me! I had my silly string in my pocket ready to go at a moments notice!

So as I was loading the car Sydnee started calling me to come outside.

Paybacks a B----!!!!

We had such a fun day!

Happy Birthday Gavin!!!

Something good....friends!

K